Today

Two years ago
today
my world shattered.

One year ago
I wrote this.

(I am happy to say that
Ida,
mentioned in last year’s post,
now has a healthy sister,
born in April.)

One year ago,
I was pregnant with
Malou’s
brother Liam…
I didn’t know it.

I was hoping,
but doubtful.

I did everything “wrong”
that cycle…
because I was so sick and tired
of doing everything “right”
cycle after cycle
and having it not work anyways.

So last May
I focused on
Malou Amelia
and that’s when I was lucky
enough to get pregnant with
her adorable brother.

But don’t you dare tell me it was because
“I relaxed!”

I didn’t.

I was a grieving mess.

Sometimes,
I still am.

Two years…

where does the time go?
Two years ago
yesterday
I was happy.

My life was just about perfect.
And I appreciated it.

And it was taken away.

My beloved daughter
was taken away.

And my heart broke.

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Published in: on May 26, 2010 at 07:03  Comments (4)  
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4 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Broken hearted for you I remain.
    And dreading August when it will be two years for me.
    How does time keep marching on like this?
    xo

  2. I remember reading your post at 12 months, and now 2 years. Where does it go? I’m glad Malou has a brother but I wish she was here with you, playing with her brother

  3. Auch wir denken an Malou, Ihre Mama und Ihren kleinen Bruder Liam. In diesen Tagen……

    Alles Liebe für Euch

  4. I’m so sorry for the loss of your beloved Malou. It is strange how two years can seem such a very long time and the blink of an eye simultaneously. x


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