Love, actually…

is
all around.

Or so they say.

We are in Belize now
and I can feel
Malou’s
presence
all around us.

I’ve been homesick before
missing loved ones

but
missing
Malou

is something entirely different.

It’s like
since she is not here
on Earth
and there is no where
I can go
to hold her
then I have the space to be
content
with what I do have,
the ways I can feel her.

So instead of being
distracted
by planning
how to get back to her
as quickly as possible

I have to just
let go
and that gives me space
to really
feel
her.

Malou, I love you. Thank you for blessing me with your presence. I know you are here. I feel you in the warm breeze, and the strong current, and the scents all around me. I see you in your daddy, I see you in other little girls who are running around me, and I see you when I look at parts of myself. I wish you were here so I could cuddle you.

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Published in: on December 11, 2008 at 04:53  Comments (3)  
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3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Stephanie – once again you truly amaze me with your writings these past months. I am so sure you are touching many people with your weekly “letters”. I too can feel Malou’s presence many times a day.

    You are such a gift to me. I pray that you and Tom will soon have a healthy child to love as much as I love you.

    PS – I just wish I had some of your talent in expressing myself in writings. Obviously that talent of yours didn’t come from me…

  2. Once again you have written so perfectly (almost romantically) You should be a novelist as I feel everything you write. You are doing so well and have the right attitude. Just follow your heart and feel the love around you, both near and from far away.
    Love.

  3. Hi Steph,
    As said many times by everyone who reads your words (and by those posted right above me), you do say it all so beautiful and amazingly. I really love what you had to say here. “Love Actually” is probably my favorite movie of all time. I don’t know if you were thinking of it when you wrote these words, but that’s what it made me think of. The movie always gives me hope and faith despite all the crap and sadness that sometimes surrounds us. And your words have the same effect on me. I hope you are soaking up all the love and sun and goodness that you can find on your trip. Love, Keely.


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